THE KOOL-AID TEST

 On Saturday

 we went for a walk on the banks of the Stour.  It was good.

 

And then the acid kicked in and it was … different ...

THE KATE WALK

 Sometimes I wonder if we may have reached peak Pedestrianism.

 

Kate Garraway has made a programme for BBC 2 titled, uncompromisingly Walking With Kate Garraway.  The BBC describe it like this ‘Kate Garraway walks through the Cotswold countryside and describes the joy and solace that nature brings as she takes in the inspiring views of Gloucestershire.’I thought at first that Joy and Solace might be the names of her two dogs, but no.

 

The Sunday Times managed to make it sound even less appealing, ‘This programme features Kate Garraway alone with a 360-degree camera.  It is, she says, the first day she has had to herself since her partner, Derek Draper was struck by long Covid, and her gentle hike allows her to meditate on the difference between being alone and lonely.’  It goes on to use the word mindfulness, which always gives me conniptions.

 

         Of course I’m very sorry that her husband was struck down with long Covid, and I’m sure that kind of thing puts great stress on a partner, and yes we know that walking is a great way to relieve stress.  Even so, I think it takes a special kind of person who, when she finally has a day to herself, goes for a walk and turns it into a TV programme. 

 

Here’s Kate and Derek walking in happier times.

WALKING (NOT EXACTLY) WITH MICHAEL AND JOHN

 

I first came across the work of Michael Landy while walking along Oxford Street 

sometime in 2001.  There, in a vacated C&A shop, Landry was having all his 

worldly goods, including a car, destroyed and put in bin sacks. The work was 

titled Break Down.

 

It was a wonderful and extraordinary idea.  As John Lennon didn’t quite say, it’s not all that hard to imagine having no possessions, but it’s very hard indeed to imagine destroying the ones you’ve got. And even if some of us have thought about doing it, it takes a very brave man to actually do it.

 

Right now if you find yourself walking into the Firstsite Gallery in Colchester you’ll see a giant piece of wall art (it’s not exactly a mural) by Landy, that was part of an exhibition titled ‘Michael Landy’s Welcome to Essex.’

        

The piece, essentially a map collage, was apparently inspired by Essex walks that Landy did with people such as Gillian Darley, Elsa James and Pam Cox, who are respectively a writer, an artist and a sociologist. 

 

It was the map of course that drew me in, but I keep thinking about that part that says ‘Welcome to England’s Most Misunderstood County’ – (also available as a postcard).  I’d have thought that was Norfolk (as in ‘normal for Norfolk’).  But then again as a Yorkshireman I’d say very few people ‘get’ Yorkshire. Or maybe that’s the nature of the beast – wherever you’re from, you think people don’t understand you.

 

One person who apparently does get Essex, is John Cooper Clark, who in my ignorance I always assumed still lived in Manchester.  But it’s there in my copy of the free magazine Colchester and Manningtree Life, that he lives in, or close to, Colchester and is a great booster for the place. He says, ‘That’s the great thing about Colchester really.  If you walk in any direction for twenty minutes, you’re actually in the countryside. Plus it’s not too far from Clacton, Walton and Winton on Sea, splendid staycation sites there.  Almost within walking distance.’  

 

Of course ‘almost within walking distance’ usually means notwithin walking distance.  But it depends on who’s doing the walking.

 

JCC’s third album (on clear vinyl!) was titled Walking Back to Happiness.  

 

WALKING WITH WEIWEI

Ai Weiwei depicted in a mural in the L.A. Art District:

I've tried and failed to find who the artist is.  I guess that's how it is with street art.  

Somebody might tell me.

The Sunday Times just had an extract from Ai Weiwei’s memoir 1000 Years of Joys and 

Sorrows, about his 81-day incarceration in Beijing in 2011, having been deemed a ‘national 

security risk.’

 

It’s grim and disturbing stuff, and of course he was treated appallingly by the Chinese authorities, and yet I wonder why they didn’t treat him worse. They could certainly have given him a life sentence, for instance. The only obvious reason I can think of for this comparative leniency is international opinion and fear that they might turn him into a martyr.  Today he seems to be allowed to travel anywhere in the world.

 

Weiwei’s work S.A.C.R.E.D. features dioramas depicting his incarceration including this one:

 

The memoir describes what he calls a room rather than a cell, ' some 280 square feet and the floor was laid with brown ceramic tiles, each 2 ft by 2ft, six tiles across and 12 tiles down.  I could exercise only on the six square in the middle of the room: after walking seven steps I had to turn around and go back in the other direction.'

    Then later: ‘From 6.50 to 7.40 am was reserved for exercise, which consisted of walking back and forth on the six permitted tiles.  The guards accompanied me on either side, walking and turning just as I did, maintaining their position and adjusting their distance as necessary, to make sure I didn’t suffer some mishap – however unlikely that might be.  Together we made up the world’s smallest drill team, but in time we reached a high level of wordless co-ordination, sensitive to the slightest changes in rhythm.’

 

         I was left wondering whether it was always the same two guards. Presumably not.  Even in China prison guards must get a day off.  So were some guards better than others at walking with him? I don’t know.

 

Now Weiwei’s free to walk more or less where he likes, such as below, where he’s seen with Anish Kapoor, walking from the Royal Academy to Stratford. The blanket shows solidarity with refugees.  (photo by Mat Smith)  

QUEENLY WALKING

 Want to see the queen with a walking stick, photographed last week?

Want to see the queen with a walking stick 17 years ago after she had a knee operation?